Bragging Rights, Round 2

Not too long ago, I posted about my sister winning an international grant writing competition. Well, today, I get to brag on the other sister: she's just been published--AGAIN.

It's her second paper on nanotechnology - you know, that fairly new scientific study of, well, tiny, tiny, tiny particulate matter? (Click here for a more robust definition, provided by Wikipedia.)

Very basically, they studied whether you could inhale nanoparticles that you'd made if you used standard lab equipment. That's what air quality environmental engineers do. They wanna know what the air quality is like.

And really, who'd want to inhale a fullerene (a.k.a., a buckyball in some instances) or a carbon nanotube? So you have some idea, here's a fullerene:
And here's a carbon nanotube:

If you're interested, you can read said article in the May 14 issue of Environmental Science Technology, published by the American Chemical Society.

Congrats, little sis!

Of Note

I evidently need to be earning a lot more money or find a man who wants to be a stay-at-home dad, according to this post by Penelope on the Brazen Carrerist. Some very good points here, including this gem, about a coworker who has got to do everything his stay-at-home wife does while she goes out of town:

Jason was telling me that his wife went out of town for five days. She told him he had to take time off from work. He said he didn’t want to use up vacation. He said he’d be fine.

But by the second day, he was going nuts. He said, “Penelope, it’s unbelievable. I am telling the kids I’ll be there in a minute and then I send an email. And I instant message chat while I’m driving. And I take phone calls when the kids are in the other room waiting for me. This is crazy. It’s so hard.”

She later goes on to say that Jason is the kind of guy that she's competing with in her career. I see a lot of myself in this post, as I'm pretty ambitious, a bit of an overachiever and want my own kids someday. Guess it's good to know what kind of challenges I'll be facing.

- This quote, from the article about a new book about the Virgina Tech shootings in today's Journal:

It's really why I wanted to write the book, because sometimes you're just not going to have answers to "why" questions. And sometimes that knowing doesn't help. We're created for something more than just answers. We're created to experience God.

Bragging Rights

My youngest sister, Deb, was informed recently that a grant she wrote as an Americorps volunteer at Boat People SOS was a winner in a competition. Well, not just a winner; it took top prize in the World Proposal Championships, earning $5,000 for the non-profit where she spent two years as an almost-paid volunteer. It was the best out of several hundred submitted from around the world. You can read more about it here. Congrats, baby girl. You've got the right stuff and you've proved it again!

And, while I'm bragging on my sister, let me just say that she can also rumba like nobody's business. And cha cha. And jive. And she loves it. You can tell. She and a stand-in partner competed at yesterday's Triangle Open Dancesport Championships. Though it was a long day, I'm now glad to say that I've gotten to see her dance in competition in person.


(Yes, the photos are a bit fuzzy. They were dancing too fast for the camera! I needed to up the ISO speed, but couldn't remember how! In any case, realize that the entire dress is fringe and you can see that fringe in the last picture - completely perpendicular to the floor!)

And the last bit of my bragging rights for the day: No. 1 North Carolina Claims ACC Crown. Sorry, Clemson, but I'm glad you guys beat those other guys in blue yesterday. Bring on the brackets . . . and let March Madness begin!

Dogwoods, Dinner and Dancing

Went to visit my littlest sis yesterday; since she and the hubster have moved back to the east coast, and they're just an hour and a half away, there's really no excuse, these days.

Decided to go to Umstead Park to canoe around the lake, only to find out that Umstead has two entrances and we came in the wrong one to get to the lake. So we hiked "Inspiration Loop," (not so inspiring, if you ask me) and took some photos and read little placards about trees.

Dinner was with the Park Alum from NCSU at 18 Seaboard in Raleigh. I hadn't realized the Park program was so new; I thought it had been around as long as the Morehead Scholars (now the Morehead-Cain Scholars) program. Alas, that is not the case. The 10th class of Park Scholars is about to graduate, and so, I was one of the oldest in the room. Many Park have moved away from the area (not surprisingly), but the dinner was overbooked, so that bodes well for the newly formed group.

I can't say much for 18 Seaboard. I think this restaurant has a lot of potential and they have an amazing wine list (they've got my Qupe Syrah), but the food really didn't live up to my expectations. Sauteed spinach was awesome, but if I'm paying that much for dinner, the steak ought to be, too. It wasn't.

The evening continued with the "social dance" part of ballroom dance. (For those of you who don't know, my sister is a WONDERFUL ballroom dancer. Wins awards and stuff. Yeah, that good. Watch her here at a competition in 2007.)

I concede to go, thinking, "Ok, I've got no idea how to do any of these dances, but I can appreciate watching dancing, so I'll just do that."

RIGHT.

Turns out you really don't have to have much of a clue of what you're doing to swing (either east coast or west coast) or lindy or salsa or bachata or meringue. Because I was doing all of that - basically - by the end of the night. With the parade of men who kept asking. Almost every single song.

Now, here's my fuss about the rules: If you just look creepy to me and I turn you down for a dance, I shouldn't be penalized for doing so. (Technically, if you turn someone down for a dance, you're not supposed to do that particular style of dance any longer. Ha.) It's not my fault my creep meter goes off. For all I know, you're going to stalk me back to wherever I live and kill me in my sleep. I'm not gonna give you that opportunity to develop such an obsession with me. Sorry. Deal with it.

French toast for breakfast, church at St. Andrew's and lunch at the mexican joint around the corner.

Quality girl time; every second of it needed. (Thanks, hon.)

The Rules for Blogging

Today was the day of many topics to blog about. I can definitely say that I'm set for the week. Stay tuned for more on that later . . .

Nonetheless, the topic I'm going to pick for this evening is this: blogging rules. It's happened again that a good friend didn't define their rules completely before getting into the blogosphere (something I have to admit that I did as well) and thus, their presence in the blogosphere changed drastically and without warning.

Now, as many in the blogosphere know, such changes are completely unexpected and cause concern in your readers especially if you have a fairly large and/or loyal readership. I've got a blog I'm stalking right now that hasn't had a post in months, but they used to post several times a day! (No, you don't get that link. It's NWS and it speaks to #7 on The List.) It's upsetting, to say the least.

Ergo, here's the draft of The Rules for Blogging. In no way shape or form is this a complete or un-alterable list. Jump in and let me know what you'd change or what you'd add. (Yep, I learned some of these the hard way. Just ask my friend Jess or my friend Jim.)

1) If you've got a significant other, tell them you have/are starting a blog and how to get to it. If they never look at it, you've done your part. Might be good to share your rules for what goes on the blog with them, so they don't have to be concerned about what may or may not appear on the blog. Remember that your significant other (and everyone else in the world with an Internet connection) can see it whenever they want, if they can find it. Don't forget that.

2) In consideration of the significant other, DON'T post anything offensive or that could be perceived as too personal UNLESS you've got permission from them BEFORE you post. Now, if you don't so much care for that significant other and aren't concerned about helping to define the legality of social media and first amendment rights or aren't concerned about a libel or slander lawsuit, post away. Post it once, and it's always there (especially after the web spiders get to it).

3) Don't write stuff you wouldn't admit in public. For me, after I mentioned my duck (the post), I realized I wasn't ready to post about it. However, my perspective on sexuality has shifted and I don't mind at all now. Realize however that some things are still not public: i.e., #7 on The List.

4) Decide what's off-limits. For me, work is always off-limits; I don't need to be dooced. I need my job. (If you're interested, Heather Armstrong's experience provided the nomenclature for this phenomenon.)

Intimate conversations with friends are also off-limits, as well as any significant reference to their lives. My family is sometimes off, sometimes on; depends on the situation.

5) Decide on pictures and video content. What will you post? What won't you post? Why? If you don't know why, you won't stick with your decision. Beware of copyright laws - and know a lawyer.

6) Be fair and give credit where it's due. Don't steal someone else's blog post. Sure, if they've got a topic that gets your writing bristles up, go for it. But give them credit for having the idea first. Link. And consider a Creative Commons license. (They're free.)

7) Ask the blogger before you add a blog to your blog roll. Admittedly, I haven't done
this, but I should have. The people who read your blog may be some other blogger's worst nightmare. The only way they may have found that blogger was through your blog roll.

8) Admit when you're wrong and publicly correct the error. We're all human and we all know that eventually, you're gonna screw up. Deal. (Here's an example, courtesy of Cara Michele at Chosen Fast.)

9) Learn about your blog/hosting service. Know how it works. Know what the passwords do. Know what's public and what's not before you jump right in. And don't be afraid to use the knowledge base. Those people know everything about hosting/blog service. They developed it - and continue to improve it. Let them help.

10) When lurking/commenting on someone else's blog, follow their lead. If they don't cuss, you'd better not. If you know them IRL and they don't specifically mention or name parts of their life on the blog, don't dare. It might violate one of their blogging rules.

And, since 10 is a nice, round number and it's past my bedtime, that's where I'll stop. I expect to hear your thoughts or opinions on this. Chime in.

Email from Grandma

(January 18, 1999; Jim is my uncle, Kathi is my aunt, Debbie is one of my sisters, and George was my grandfather. He died earlier than my grandmother, and while I know she was heartbroken - from emails like this - she knew she still had work to do on this earth and loved every day of it. I'm sure I was some of that work.)

Sorry, haven't kept up with all the latest. The computer was on the "blink" for almost a week. The c.d. modem didn't want to work . . . and just HAD to have my daily dose of Scrabble . . . so Jim replaced it for me.

It's been dangerous trying to walk up my driveway, because the snow started to melt, then froze solid. Not hard at all coming DOWN to the house . . . but sheer "you know what" trying to get up to get the paper and mail. So, I cut that chore down to once a day. I've spread de-icer on about half the drive, but can only do so much at a time.

Kathy came up on Monday, and after various attempts to get her car back up the drive - almost skidding backwards into the shop, I had her stop and we called for help. One of her friends with a 4by4 came up and pulled her right out.

We're due for a lot more snow and ice on Sunday . . . so, if I make it to Mass it will be a miracle. Every time the snowplow comes up, he blocks my drive with a foot or three of snow. Then that pile freezes hard and it's just like climbing Mt. Everest. I have a great snow plow, but I can`t move it. It's way to heavy for me. Jim usually clears it for me, but while I'm having snow up here, the "flat-landers" are getting rain. So, he always seems surprised when he comes up on Sundays and sees all the snow.

How's the job hunting going? Any likely looking prospects? By the way, what is your major in college? Have been wondering what you were planning on after the big day. Kathy and I will be there for the big day (for yours and Debbie's).

This will probably be the last trip for me . . . getting harder and harder to make that trip. God willing, I'll be able to be there this year, with lots of help from Kathy and the stewards. But each day, I thank God for another day. I look out at the deer, and the snow, and the beautiful mountains, and I say thanks to George for giving me such a beautiful place for my last years.

It's too bad that God needed a "fixer-upper" in heaven and took him early. But I know he's watching over me from up there . . . I have NO doubt.

Love you,
Grandma

Ahh, the weekend

I may be closing in on my harbour these days, especially after the day I had yesterday. Yes, it was ridiculously busy, but the party at the end of the day was completely worth it. I always worry that people I invite from that county to the east will decide the drive won't be worth it, so I'm still amazed and thrilled that I can get people to travel that far for a little food and a beer or two.

Still, there's mulch to be spread and weeds to be killed. But it's probably not going to happen today.

Today is sit around and do whatever I want to do day. Like ponder my sister's request that we publish Tawanka's emails. I know I've mentioned this before to certain individuals - and have been heartily encouraged to do so. The idea of actually writing the book is the one that's scary. Nonetheless, the idea continues to present itself, so I suppose it might actually be time to explore it.

I could see how this could turn into something bigger, even. While my grandmother was quite prolific with her emails at the end of her life, she always had great stories to tell. I know there are stories about wolves, about moose, about bears, her long-time postman, her foster children, her natural children, etc. The thought of collection those though, at this point, seems insurmountable. There would definitely be a trip or two to the west coast involved. Right now, I don't have the time (or the money) for that. Maybe in a couple of years . . .

Things that went right today

"Sometimes more than others/

You see who and what and where/

You are . . ."

- Jimmy Buffett, Tonight I Just Need My Guitar, Far Side of the World, 2002

It's been an odd day, but I've realized that there were quite a few great things today as well. The great things show me more precisely who and what and where I am - and I'm very happy about that.

Here's the list . . .

(a) Realizing that some writer from the Business Journal thinks that everyone who reads the Business Journal knows what "je ne sais quoi" means. I can't believe the editor didn't catch that paragraph and make him rewrite it. I think it's pretty funny.

(b) Lunch with my friend Amanda and a really great mushroom swiss burger at Jay's.

(c) A really long, really awesome email from my friend Ashley.

(d) Cancelling the meeting I had tonight.

(e) Not having to go to the symphony tonight, because Jess said whatever I wanted to do was great, and I really didn't want to go to the symphony.

(f) The really nice email from my mom and the great conversation I had with her later in the evening.

(g) The high-fives and wows that I heard from my big bosses when they saw the interactive map that we launched today. (No link, I try to keep work out of the blog. If you don't know where I work already, I'm not telling.)

(h) The high-fives and wows that I heard from my big bosses when they saw the Dining web page that we launched today. (No link. See above reason at g.)

(i) My direct boss mentioning that I was great hire in front of both of them.

(j) Knowing that my friends are awesome - and having great proof of it today. "The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life."

(k) Having a great discussion with my cousin/sister-in-law and realizing how much I miss her.

(l) Talking with so many people who evidently love me.

(m) Spicy guacamole.

(n) The long walk with Jess around Ardmore.

(o) Chamomile tea.

(p) A fairly decent discussion with my husband.

(q) Finding flea medicine for the cat in the pet drawer, after thinking there wasn't any there.

(r) Hearing my sister's voice on my voicemail.

(s) The free stuff coupon from Vickie's in the mail when I got home.

(t) Knowing that even though my duck is on the fritz, he's on his way to rehab, which means he's on his way back that much quicker . . . although I'm already ready for him to be back.

(u) Feeling lots, lots better in the evening than I did in the morning and knowing that tomorrow's probably going to be a pretty good day, too. At least that's the plan.

She knew six

I found out late Tuesday evening that my sister in California, a double alumna, knew six of the victims of Monday's shooting at Virgina Tech.

Two things she said to me that just cut me to the quick:

"Lizzy, that RA (resident advisor) was just going to help one of his residents.

I WOULD have done when I was an RA."

And this, when they'd identified just 23 of the victims . . .

"There are nine more. I just hope I don't know any more."

Because of that, my heart aches for her. Because of that, I miss her immensely this week. Because of that, I wish I could hug her. Because of that, I sent her flowers on Friday, the only day of the week she hadn't cried yet.

Because of that, I decided today was the day I'd finish my grieving for the Virgina Tech family. I watched the convocation and wanted to see a video of the candlelight vigil they held on the drillfield. This is the best one I've seen.

And I continue to be moved by Nikki Giovanni's speech and her closing words: "We are Virginia Tech. We will prevail. We are the Hokies."

Friend speaks my mind.

She's so right.

Why, oh why, do parents ever even attempt to have a discussion about sex with their grown (or, for that matter, almost grown) children? Mamalikey shares her grand discussion with her mom here. Painful, but hilarious at the same time. Really, parents weren't born yesterday; do they really think such?

I suppose it happens with everyone, but I am incensed to think that my parents are much more liberal about sex and their children than they were when I was younger. Let's put it this way: they had an absolute and complete fit when they finally figured it out (through my own missteps, unfortunately), two boyfriends later.

My brother and sisters - I think they've had it easier. Course, that's what the oldest always does: blaze the way for the others.

And, why is it that one of the odd conversations isn't enough? Yep, as I was sharing with Jess a little tidbit about a duck that I'd like and how, if it were good, I'd give it to every one of the gals in my fam in my generation, mom walks in the kitchen and asks us what's funny.

Um, it's a girl thing, mom. Not really to be shared with mothers.

A harsh reminder

It happens, every once in a while, that you are reminded that life isn't just about you and your world. You're reminded of bigger things, which take you from "shallow theology straight into deep simplicity" - because that's what it is. When things like this happen, your system is so shocked that everything is completely re-framed and the truly important becomes truly important again, at least for a little bit.

Today, several hundred people and I celebrated the end of a life. To be honest, I had only met the man perhaps twice and both times were in the past year. His was a life filled with a myriad of blessings, and as all lives, challenges, but one lived well nonetheless. His was a life that impacted so many through his work and the evidence of such was overwhelming at the service.

Given that I was not close with this man, I would have considered not going, until I remembered something I've learned since I've had to start attending funerals: they are for the living, not for the dead. Thus, because I consider myself a friend to his son and his daughter-in-law, I was happy to pay my respects.

Funerals are the formal opportunity for friends and family to grieve. They are the time when society says, "It's ok to show this emotion. This is the time to do it. You have all the permission you need." Certainly, the grief doesn't end when the funeral does and it often never completely leaves a person.

Over the next several weeks and months, I know that my friends who lost this great man will be frequently distressed by the normal and everyday. Simple questions like, "How's your family?" and any reminder of a father could inadvertently upset them for quite some time.

The harsh reminder that life is fleeting and should be cherished has been shared among many this day. That we all should have the ability to hang onto that reminder for more than a day would be a blessing in disguise. May it be so.

I love my sisters

And they'll probably kill me for posting this, but it just shows you how much fun we are when we get together. I miss them both, lots, because they live in far, far away places. Ok, maybe not so far away places, but for me to get there, I'd actually have to plan to go. Which I need to do soon.