A harsh reminder

It happens, every once in a while, that you are reminded that life isn't just about you and your world. You're reminded of bigger things, which take you from "shallow theology straight into deep simplicity" - because that's what it is. When things like this happen, your system is so shocked that everything is completely re-framed and the truly important becomes truly important again, at least for a little bit.

Today, several hundred people and I celebrated the end of a life. To be honest, I had only met the man perhaps twice and both times were in the past year. His was a life filled with a myriad of blessings, and as all lives, challenges, but one lived well nonetheless. His was a life that impacted so many through his work and the evidence of such was overwhelming at the service.

Given that I was not close with this man, I would have considered not going, until I remembered something I've learned since I've had to start attending funerals: they are for the living, not for the dead. Thus, because I consider myself a friend to his son and his daughter-in-law, I was happy to pay my respects.

Funerals are the formal opportunity for friends and family to grieve. They are the time when society says, "It's ok to show this emotion. This is the time to do it. You have all the permission you need." Certainly, the grief doesn't end when the funeral does and it often never completely leaves a person.

Over the next several weeks and months, I know that my friends who lost this great man will be frequently distressed by the normal and everyday. Simple questions like, "How's your family?" and any reminder of a father could inadvertently upset them for quite some time.

The harsh reminder that life is fleeting and should be cherished has been shared among many this day. That we all should have the ability to hang onto that reminder for more than a day would be a blessing in disguise. May it be so.