12.31.2007

A Look Back . . .

T minus five hours until 2008 arrives. Happy New Year!

Just have a quick minute before I go to have a fabulous (I hope!) lasagna dinner with some old friends, an acquaintance from high school (she remembers me; me, not so much) and some other people I honestly don't know. Then, we'll be off to Tanglewood, where we'll be walking the 5K through the Festival of Lights. Probably the only way to experience the lights, I'm convinced.

Expect two late posts (really, I wanted to do these today, and it just didn't happen) about whether I accomplished the List for 2007 (as well as the new List for 2008) and, because I think it would be interesting, a review of the quotes I've included at the bottom of my emails. They probably match my mood on the blog; I can promise that they match the mood in my personal writing, but that's not for general consumption.

Completely unrelated: I've figured out how to completely wipe a hard drive (well, as much as you can wipe one without drilling holes through the motherboard and melting other parts of it). It's not the easiest, but it's done. Goodwill got the computer and I feel good that the mercury and lead in the computer didn't get put into the landfill.

And because I have no focus, there's seven-layer dip in front of me and it's almost time to go have lasagna, I'll bid adieu for now.

Happy New Year!

12.30.2007

Too Good Not to Share

"We will be happy when we are happy and sad when we are sad, and we will find as many reasons as we can think of to milk every drop of joy out of every day of life because otherwise things really are a little depressing, and it's no fun being depressed. Trust me: I know. The alternative is much superior."

-Courtesy of my dear friend Melody Watson. Read more, including the rest of this blog post, here.

Giving

(February 5, 1999)

If we could look ahead, we would be comforted to know that we have worked for, and what we have given our hearts to, will reward us. We cannot give and give and not receive, especially if we have given willingly and cheerfully.

We have shared in many ways and many times when it seemed unimportant. We gave without thought that it would do anything but help - and these are the gifts that will not go unrewarded.

Giving is so often thought in terms of the things we give, but our greatest giving is of our time, and kindness, and even comfort for those who need it. We look on these gifts as unimportant - until we need them.

Then, the most wonderful gift is simple courage.


Peace.
Tawanka

12.29.2007

Healing and Peace

(January 24, 1999)

Little things heal our hurts. Sounds, scents, a soft spoken word and music that may mean nothing to someone else, can reach into our souls and do a work that ordinary methods cannot reach. Simple remedies can heal the deepest hurts - a love that springs from inner wells, the sound of birds and the laughter of children at play.


Our job is to avoid the negative side - to think and speak only healing words. The choice is ours. Though we make many of them a day, we do it so unconsciously that we have not realized their effect - fretting about every little thing, letting the world steal our peace and lying down when we should be up and doing.

Choose to be well, find contentment and be a role model for those who watch. LISTEN for peace.

Peace,
Tawanka

Slow Saturday

Yes, it's been a slow Saturday. I've been cooking, reading and napping. Not much else, but at least there's Indian Potato Chicken Curry in the crock, apple coffee cake and brownies to be had in my house.

And, I've gotten into this present from Santa: Leap of Faith: Memoirs of an Unexpected Life by Queen Noor. I've wanted it for years, so I'm glad Santa brought it to me. So far, so good. I'm already wishing I could have her sign it for me. Need to go update Goodreads . . .

Oh, and anyone got any good suggestions for the quote I'm going to put on my library wall above the desk? Needs to be something that I won't get sick of quickly. I'll post a photo after I get it in and hung.

12.28.2007

Today's Comics of Note



Copyrights are those of their respective holders.

12.24.2007

Tracking Santa . . .

Santa visited me early this year, but I realize he didn't visit everyone early this year. So, you can watch NORAD track Santa (I love that we spend government money on this; it's all about the kids) here. And, if you want a different language, the site is in at least five different ones.

If you have Google Earth (I don't, but plan on downloading it post-haste now), you can track Santa in 3D.

You can watch videos of Santa sightings here, courtesy of YouTube and Norad. (Some of the videos have over 500K views. I'm a fan of this one:






Oh, and you can talk to a NORAD Santa tracker in person. There's an 800 number. Alas, I couldn't get through to find out what the hubbub is about, but good luck if you try the number!

And, if you're interested, somehow Santa has time to blog about his adventures, here.

I can only imagine what my childhood would be like if I were very young in this day and age.

12.16.2007

Food for thought

From the RevolutionHealth.com website:

"A healthy relationship must have the following characteristics:
- physical chemistry or affection
- real intimacy
- fun
- safety, trust and security with the other person
- mutual respect."

Of the many thoughts I have about this, the only one appropriate for this medium is this: Wow.

12.13.2007

Good morning!

It's 4:30 a.m. EST.

I was up at 3:30 a.m. EST.

I've gotten less than five hours of sleep.

I'm perking real coffee as I type.

Hope your day is ending up better than mine is - already.

12.01.2007

The Significance of December 1




From the AmFAR website: "For the past 19 years, the world has marked World AIDS Day—December 1—with events commemorating the 25 million people who have died of AIDS and with a recommitment to fighting the epidemic. Each year, the number of people affected by the pandemic increases, and the calls to action grow louder. The message this December 1 is clear: AIDS is not simply someone else’s problem. Under the theme of leadership, this year’s World AIDS Day will highlight the need for strong and committed leaders at all levels of society to join the fight against AIDS."

11.28.2007

Two days early, even

You Won!

Yep, I hit 50,117 today. I won. I'm done.
Except not. I've easily got another 10K to write before the first draft is done. Maybe I'll finish that this weekend.
But for now, I'm done. Yeah!

11.27.2007

Nanowrimo

Almost done.

No blogging when you've put in as many words as I have in the past three days. I've gone from 22, 700ish to where I am now.

46, 173.

I'm technically ahead of schedule. I'm ready to be done. It's exhausting. And the book may not be neatly finished at 50,000 words. I think it might end up being 60,000 or so before the first draft is all said and done.

11.26.2007

Happiness, Joy and Thankfulness: Part II

This thinking about happiness has also led me to thoughts about joy. For me, happiness and joy are not the same.

Dictionary.com gives these synonyms for joy: rapture, bliss, pleasure. It gives these for happiness: pleasure, joy, exhilaration, bliss, contentedness, delight, enjoyment, satisfaction.

It continues to say: “Happiness . . . implies an active or passive state of pleasure or pleasurable satisfaction. Happiness results from the possession or attainment of what one considers good.”

This seems to sum up my thoughts on the differences of happiness and joy quite well: happiness is something attained, realized, sought and achieved. Happiness is a result of something. You are happy because something happened.

Joy, on the other hand, is organic. It just happens. It may spring from happiness, but it is not caused by anything. Joy is a blessing. Joy is the purer form of emotion. Joy is happiness to the 3,000th power – and then some.

Joy is the rarer of the two emotions; at least it is for me. In fact, I’d say that’s the case for most people. To experience anything on such a level requires being on such a level more often than I am. Don’t get me wrong; there are some people who reside on the “joy” level all the time. (One of my girlfriends in college was this way; she bubbled over with joy all the time. When she was having an “off” day, she was still obviously happy. Her joy always returned to her quickly.)

The question becomes: by allowing yourself to be happy more often, do you open yourself to experiencing the thrill of joy more often? Do you raise yourself to a new level, where perhaps the jump to joy is less difficult than perhaps your current, normal, everyday mental state?

During the holiday, I’ve been very thankful for the joy and the happiness I’ve been experiencing over the past week. I’ve been thankful for the house I own, for the car I drive (that continues to be in great shape despite almost 190K miles), for the job I have, for so many wonderful people in my life, for the journey that I’m on.

I hope you’ve taken the time to recognize that for which you are thankful recently. I hope that you’re thankful for certain people being in your life and that you’ve had the guts and taken the opportunity to tell them. I hope that you find happiness in sharing that thankfulness, and maybe, just maybe, find joy in such an act.

I know I do.

11.24.2007

Happiness, Joy and Thankfulness: Part I

It has turned out to be a great week (regardless of my stagnant NaNo count: 22,700ish). It didn’t necessarily start that way, but it certainly has become one that I really am happy about. It’s given me a lot of reason to think about happiness, joy and thankfulness.

Deciding what makes me happy (or at least adding to that list) has been a large part of what I’ve been trying to accomplish over the past several months. I’ve always known some things make me happy: sunsets, flowers, the smell of dew on a spring morning, a walk in the fog by the creek, spending time with friends, the birdsong that wakes me in the morning. But the journey of trying to figure out what makes one happy, I think, might be simply about accepting the feeling of happiness from those moments in life.

Not so surprisingly, the fact that I’ve been thinking about what makes me happy got me into a conversation about such with a good friend of mine. We’re a lot alike; the synchronicity that results from that is scary sometimes, but in this case it gave me a bit of perspective about my happiness that I didn’t have yet. That perspective has helped me begin to realize more of what I am happy about – or perhaps more correctly, that which would make me happy if I allowed it.

This conversation devolved into a list, as I’d venture to say such conversations are wont to do. Here’s a smattering of that list; of course, it’s an agglomeration of the conversation and I certainly can’t take all the credit for the part of list that appears here:

Family, good friends, seeing your breath in the morning's first light as the sun just starts to peak over the horizon, the stars, the low rumble of a kitty purr on your chest. The Annual Yarborough Chicken Stew. A good book. Beethoven. Mozart, to some degree, but certainly Ella Fitzgerald. Good concerts. Knowing that somewhere, somehow, someday, someone loves you more than you will ever know or will ever deserve. Love. Holidays. Finally having a clean house. Real hugs. Not the hugs that casual friends give when meeting, but the hugs that feel as if they are trying to hold in all of the good feelings while squeezing out all of the bad ones. Cajun crab dip and water crackers. Mexican food. Pizza. The smell of summer. The ocean. The mountains. Camp fires. Cookouts. Massages. Being alone. Being with everyone who loves you. Sitting in the hot tub. Playing in the rain. The smell of star-gazer lilies. Pictures of friends and family. Finding a great piece of art. Being able to afford that piece of art. Coffee. Good pancakes. The smell of pumpkin candles in the fall, cinnamon candles in the winter. Getting drunk with your friends and knowing they won't hold it against you. Good wine. Most parties. Long phone conversations with your siblings. Fixing the computer. Fixing stuff around the house without needing help. Knowing you can do that without needing help. Being able to negotiate well. Singing your favorite hymns. Singing in the car. Wake Forest's Annual Community Lovefeast, after they cut the lights off at the end and everyone sings "Morning Star." Knowing what a Moravian Star is and having one because you appreciate its meaning. An old typewriter that works. Watching families reunite at the end of the concourse at the airport. Real conversations. Appreciating the bad because it brings out the good. Finally settling into a really difficult yoga pose after months of working on it. Achieving your goals. Finishing the triathlon. Swimming. Realizing you solved a pretty serious problem while you were swimming. Libraries. Book sales. A genuine smile from a stranger. Knowing that your in-laws (the ones you got from your siblings) like you, even if they do think you're weird. Being a little weird. Loving it because it makes you, you.

That list of things that makes me happy got even longer this week. Yes, I’d say it’s a direct result of Thanksgiving (and a few other things that happened). I can now add this to it:

Happening upon a dear old friend in Best Buy. Finding something you’ve been looking for. Finding something you’d lost. Celebrating the return of something that was lost. Making a hard decision and knowing you’re right about it, the second after it’s made. Hearing this, upon entering the house at which you’re celebrating thanksgiving, because it’s so darn funny: “Happy Thanksgiving! And what type of alcohol would you like to start with?” Doing something to be able to say you’ve done it. Helping out. The Salvation Army bell ringers. Movies (but not scary ones) . . .

What would you add to the list?

11.20.2007

Today

:)
Really, that about sums it up.

11.19.2007

Life

(January 24, 1999)

New life comes only when we turn loose the old. There must be a place for what we want or need. If there is not a place prepared, the new life flows on by--and we are left with the same things we have always had. If we think we cannot bear to part with the old way of life, we are not ready to accept anything new.

Instead, we can make a personal decision to forget what is behind and push forward to what is ahead. Our mental and spiritual attitudes make room for a new life when we set them in motion with our words. Nothing will overtake us, not love, not prosperity, not peace and joy - until we make a place for them and ask them to come in.

Hope, alone, does not do it, but a firm decision for a new life will clear the way.

Peace,
Tawanka

11.18.2007

Waiting and Joy

(January 24, 1999)

Waiting tests our faith, and anything else we have on the line. We activate every nerve in us to move, to do something - and then we wait. But if we wait a little longer with patience and endurance, we will know what to do.

During this time, we can stir up the gifts that are in us, encourage ourselves to be strong and calm, to find a quiet center in the midst of all the debris around us.

When we can wait with joy, it connects us to the right things, puts us in the right place to receive. Joy is not of the emotions but of the spirit, and it can bubble up and grow in our weakest moments.

Peace,
Tawanka

P.S. Tom is holding his own in the hospital . . . fighting off his infected kidney with lots of antibiotics. Still need the prayers, tho. Thanks. Mom

11.17.2007

Regrets

My profound thought of the day:

"If I had known that I'd go through all of this, I never would have gotten involved."

*Sigh.*

11.16.2007

For the coming week of thanks . . .

I recently got into a discussion with a friend about what makes me happy. Ok, technically, what makes us happy. If it was a conversation about me, it would have been pretty one-sided and therefore, not a conversation.

Regardless, it's a topic about which I've been thinking lots recently. Significant change tends to do that: put you into a very introspective mood and make you really question what you know about yourself. It makes for a great time of self-discovery, a trend most readers of this blog will recognize is happening here (see the posts on Finding My Focus, Echoes of Friendship, Personal Branding, These Days, and Winter).

Less than a week from today, those of us in America celebrate Thanksgiving. A festival of thanks. A chance to be introspective and to be grateful. A chance to realize how beholden you are to people around you. A time to sit back and really look at what pleases you in your life. And to figure out what would really please you in your life. And to figure out how to get there.

So here's your challenge. Begin to reflect. Think. Pause. Ask.

Yes, such actions can bring up unwanted feelings. Yes, they can bring up sore points. Yes, they can resurrect problems thought resolved.

But, realize that doing this thinking, pausing, reflecting and asking will allow you to realize more deeply who you are.

Then embrace it. And be thankful.

11.10.2007

Word of the Day

Courtesy of Dictionary.com:


"pro·cras·ti·nate /proʊˈkræstəˌneɪt, prə-/ [proh-kras-tuh-neyt, pruh-]verb, -nat·ed, -nat·ing.

–verb (used without object)
1. to defer action; delay: to procrastinate until an opportunity is lost.

–verb (used with object)
2. to put off till another day or time; defer; delay.

Origin: 1580–90; pro-1 + -crāstināre, deriv. of crāstinus of tomorrow; crās tomorrow + -tinus suffix forming adjs. from temporal advs.)]"

Yeah, I might get back to my novel this evening. Ok, I will. I just want to clean out my email first. And maybe try to find my lost memory card for my camera and the card reader. And put away the clean clothes. And fill up the new purse. And do the dishes. And go paint the shelf on the shed (Oh, wait, it's dark. Darn . . . hmm, I could just take the ever-so-useful headlamp out to paint . . .).

I could just camp on the lottery website and refresh the screen until they update the winning number for this week. Or take the recycling out. Or put the dead houseplant in the composter. Or make brownies. Ooh, or pumpkin bread. Or empty my Google reader. Or blog more. Or call my brother and my sister and my other sister. Or . . .

11.07.2007

Peace

(January 23, 1999)

Speak to me of serenity, of treasures yet to be found, of peace that flows like a river. Tell me of a tranquil place that no hand has marred, no storm has scarred.

Give me visions of standing in sunlight or the feeling of spring mist against my cheek as I live and move and breathe. Show me paths that wind through wild lilies and beds of buttercups. Sing me songs like the mingled voices of wrens and meadowlarks, the lowing of gentle cows, the soft mother-call of a mare to her colt.


Lead me past a glass smooth pond where frogs croak of their coming-out parties, their graduation from frisky tadpoles to squat green frogs.


Find me a place in the sunlight to sit and think and listen to the inner voice that says quietly, "Peace, be still."
If you've had a rough day (or night) re-read, then close your eyes and let peace flow over you.

Peace,
Tawanka

11.06.2007

Winter

I work until 5:30, which I think works perfectly for me.

Until today.

Today, around 5:10 or so, I walked out of my office to get something off the printer, and when I walked back in, I was surprised not to see trees outside of my window. In fact, I didn't see anything except a perfect reflection of myself. I was surprised because I had, in fact, painted my kitchen stools on the back porch last night AFTER I got home. Granted, I had the porch light on, so perhaps that's skewed my perception some, but I could have sworn that it wasn't pitch black outside at or before 5:30 yesterday.

*Sigh.*

Although I miss the light of spring and summer - both the quantity and the quality - I also do appreciate the changing of the seasons. The trees are quite beautiful; I'll occasionally come upon one that really makes me stop and think about the automatic response of living things on the earth to the earth's revolution. It's usually the maples that have turned so fiery red, all at once, so no other color appears to remain on the leaves. Or the tulips, which turn such a ethereal gold.

I love the crispness of the night this time of year. This phenomenon is what gives all of those holiday songs about twinkling their basis. You can see forever, yet the refraction of the light in the atmosphere still creates a "twinkle." I've always thought that this weather makes the tradition of holiday lights just fabulous. (Aside: Ever wanted to walk through the Festival of Lights, instead of having to drive through it? There's a 5K this year, December 31, at midnight. And, while I'm sure the race organizers would much prefer that you run, I plan on walking. What better way to ring in the new year.)

From my vantage point, in my little house in the Krispy Kreme Capital of the World, the buildings of downtown come into sharp focus. The edges which normally blur in the summer's humidity are now present, allowing you to see exactly how impressive a 34 story building is.

I love that, even in the light-polluted city, you can clearly see Orion over the Northern horizon early at night. I love that you can catch a glimpse of the milky way here and that you can occasionally catch a glimpse of several bright stars in the milky way. I long to drive out to the mountains, sit by a lake or in a clearing, far from the lights of the city, and stare at the stars in the sky.

It's overwhelming when I can do that. The sheer number of stars that I can finally see that cover the sky, from the north horizon to the south, from the east horizon to the west. The complete enormity of the creation overcomes me and I realize how small a part of this world I actually am. At no time is Psalm 46:10 more true for me than at that time, in those moments: "Be still, and know that I am God."

The cold of the season also makes me very thankful - for everything. That I've got a warm cat asleep on my lap right now is one of those things for which I'm thankful. That my stinky dog sits and naps behind me as I write this. That a smile of a friend or an acquaintance warms that which heat simply cannot: the heart and soul. That hot chocolate is free in my office. That I've got a fire pit on my back porch, which begs for a fire, even though we're still in a drought. That I can afford to pay my heating bill, when so many others cannot.

That I can let a crock pot sit all day with yummy, warm goodness, ready for me when I walk in the door. That I appreciate the strong smells of the seasons: pumpkin and cinnamon. That the music which feels so cold and sad earlier in the year, feels surprisingly peaceful and sometimes, cheerful in contrast to the weather.

And so, although I'll bemoan the cold and the lack of light and the curse of having to ever change out of shorts and flip flops, I realize the change makes me appreciate that which I love dearly even more - be it in summer or in winter.

11.05.2007

Habits (a.k.a., Addictions)

(January 23, 1999)

Habit has its beginning in thought. What becomes second nature to us has first caught on in our thinking - only to operate, in time, without thinking at all.

Breaking with deeply ingrained addictions is something else again. Since we were old enough to understand, we have been bent to a certain thought, molded to act and to react until we follow through habitually. If what we did gave us comfort or made us feel good, we did it again.

We have to fight habit with habit, deliberately changing one thought, one action, for another. If we simply try to remove a habit without filling the vacuum, we are opening the door for more and worse to come in. It's harder when we let thought drift back to remember how we were comforted.

There is more than one comfort, more than one joy in forming a new habit.

Peace,
Tawanka

11.04.2007

A real threat . . .

now that I'm doing NaNoWriMo:Some of you are already there.



11.02.2007

Party knowledge

A) Try a chocolate cake shot. It won't look like there's anyway it will taste like chocolate cake, especially when you're holding a lemon in your hand, but it will.

B) Sam's sells mini tacos. Cute, although not a fave.

C) Buy a copy of this book: Book of Questions. It's got great conversation starters, such as this one: "If you could spend one year in perfect happiness but afterward would remember nothing of the experience would you do so? If not, why not?"

Or this one: "If you woke on a warm morning alone, how long would you stay in bed?"

If you can guess what my answer to that was (Brian, don't tell Jess; Jess, don't ask Brian), you'll win a prize.

11.01.2007

Persistence

(January 21, 1999)

Giving up robs us of drawing up gold from our own depths. Imagine having a well, a very deep well, that is topped off with several feet of tainted water. But deeper down, the water is clear, and even farther down it is a spring, a spring that bubbles cold and pure through deposits of gold.

Should we give up because of what we saw in the beginning? Or would we want to tap the depths and clear away the polluted water and get down to the very best?

If it is true that we only know five percent of who and what we are---then, it is possible that we have untapped depths, where our being is pure and free of contamination.

Should we give up such a rich experience because of what we've seen on the surface?

Peace,
Tawanka

The Madness Begins


Today is day one of NaNoWriMo. I'm done for today and looking for a widget that shows my word count on the side of the blog. 1671 words. Just 48,329 to go. Wow, that's a big number.
Otherwise, life is trucking along, except for the $1400 bill I got for the hoity-toity frou-frou doctor's exam that I had in APRIL. Yeah, I said APRIL. I got the bill yesterday. Let's see, that's, hmm, SEVEN MONTHS. *&^% who don't know how to do things in a timely manner. I'm going to try to figure out several things about this tomorrow:
  1. WHY did it take SEVEN MONTHS to send a bill?
  2. WHY it wasn't a covered expense. I understood - as did all parties around me - that it would be.
  3. WHY I wasn't told it wasn't a covered expense AT THE TIME.
  4. WHO'S going to pay it. If I've got to, I will, but the hoity-toity frou-frou exam wasn't worth $1400. They couldn't even tell me if my osteoporosis was improving.

Grr . . .

10.30.2007

It's October

Yes, it's October for about 29 more hours. It's the month that we celebrate breast cancer awareness. And Halloween.

It's also Domestic Violence Awareness Month. I'd bet that you know someone who's been a victim of domestic violence, even if you didn't KNOW it. According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, 4 MILLION women experience a serious assault by a domestic partner within a 12 month period. That's right. 4 MILLION. When you consider that's more people than the entire population of Oregon or Oklahoma or Connecticut or Iowa or Mississippi or Arkansas or any of the other 16 other states that have smaller populations, it's more than upsetting.

One out of three women around the world have been abused. That's 30%, people.

It's also a very sad reality that the NDHV has an "escape" button and a warning about web caches posted prominently on their website.

Take a minute to learn about domestic violence. Check out the signs of an abusive relationship here. Here's what you can do if you're friends or family of someone who you suspect is being abused.

10.29.2007

My New Marathon

Back in the spring, in a fit of overzealous-ness, Jess and I decided we should train for a marathon.

For a while, we did. But then life got in the way, getting complicated and busy, and was too much fun to find time to run for hours a day (and much too hot). So we realized the insanity of that decision, chalked our $80 fee up to a hard-learned lesson and moved on.

Now, however, we're about to start a new marathon. And we're pulling people down - oops, I mean, convincing them to take the journey - with us. (Jim, you're such a good sport. Ashley, are you in?)

NaNoWriMo begins on Thursday. Our goal is to write a 50,000 word novel in a month. Each of us. At the end of November, there will be at least three more novels in the world. The idea is simply that aspiring authors may never actually write an entire novel if they can't do the hard part in 30 days. They're probably right.

And, because I think we're all starting to realize the insanity of this new "marathon," I went to the Winston-Salem Writers program on how to survive NaNoWriMo tonight.

So, here are the tips. (Sorry, I took lots of notes.)
  1. Trick your internal censors - write faster!
  2. Accept that your novel will be crap - now. Move on.
  3. Stick to your deadline. Set mini deadlines. Reward yourself for meeting them.
  4. Don't procrastinate. Make your deadline three weeks instead of four.
  5. Brag. Tell everyone you know you're doing NaNoWriMo. Just don't tell the people at your office - unless they'd be ok with you writing at work. This will help keep you accountable - and hopefully, on track.
  6. Write a contract with yourself and sign it. Make the penalty significant. (Suggestion: pick the one organization you really hate and write a significant donation check to them. If you don't meet your goal, send it.)
  7. Get a writing buddy.
  8. Take bets that you'll actually accomplish this goal. Make them good. $5, $10, $50 that you will finish the novel. No dishes for the next six months. Or lawn mowing. Or taking out the trash. Or cleaning toilets. Remember those bets when you seem to have writer's block or you find yourself procrastinating. Definitely remember those bets when you finish your novel and go to collect. You'll deserve it.
  9. Create a "good space" in which to write. Clean it before 11/1. Remove all non-novel related distractions. Include your list of Novel Sins (the stuff you hate in books) and Novel Virtues (the stuff you can't get enough of in books). Have snacks and/or coffee nearby. Don't make yourself go to the kitchen to nosh.
  10. Find a writing totem. It can be a hat, scarf, gloves, mask - anything. Not only does this help to prepare your mind to write your 1,667 words everyday, it can be an outward sign to others in your family that they're not to bother you.
  11. Play music, if it helps. Wear headphones to block out other noises. If you can find music appropriate to your theme, even better.
  12. Keep a notebook or recorder with you at all times. You never know when your next plot point will arrive and you don't want to forget it.
  13. Get a magical pen. Get two. Bless them, knowing they've got all the characters, plot, settings, etc. inside of them. Use the second when the first runs out of ink (or magic).
  14. Ditch the reference books. Italicize/bold/highlight that which needs help and do it later. You don't have time to edit and/or rewrite during NaNoWriMo. If you do, you don't have a life. You can rewrite for the next 11 months of the year, until NaNoWriMo 2008. Let it go.
  15. Develop your characters (slightly) now, if you have a chance. If not, it's no big deal. Just don't spend too much time planning when you should be writing later.
  16. Don't worry about plot. It will take care of itself.
  17. Keep your locations familiar, or, if you must set a scene in an unfamiliar place, don't spend a lot of time on the research of the place. You just don't have that luxury.
  18. Create tension. Twist the plot. Include conflict.
  19. Don't use the second-person point-of-view. Write from the first person if you must, but you'll get bored somewhere through the novel if you do. If you can write in third person, do. This allows you to "move around" and add perspective to your novel.
  20. Everyday, after hitting your 1,667 goal, stop at an exciting point. Don't finish the thought/graph. Give yourself the gift of starting excited every day.
Anyone want to join us? You just have to come up with 50,000 words by the end of November, starting this Thursday. And, I'd say wish us luck, but luck has nothing to do with it.

10.28.2007

Not Surprising

Your Linguistic Profile:

50% General American English

35% Dixie

5% Upper Midwestern

5% Yankee

0% Midwestern





What Kind of Reader Are You?
Your Result: Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm

You're probably in the final stages of a Ph.D. or otherwise finding a way to make your living out of reading. You are one of the literati. Other people's grammatical mistakes make you insane.

Dedicated Reader
Book Snob
Literate Good Citizen
Non-Reader
Fad Reader
What Kind of Reader Are You?
Create Your Own Quiz

10.25.2007

These days . . .

I've been thinking a lot about the important things in my life. Any regular reader of this blog knows that tournament is one of those things. So I recently decided to relive a bit of the good parts of this year's tournament. Thanks to the GGO Blogger, I was able to do that.

And, here's some of what I think are the most meaningful posts he's put up this year.
Thanks for the memories, GGO Blogger. They're treasured.

10.23.2007

For All Those Who Have or Have Ever Had Cats

This really reminds me of one of my childhood cats, Stripes . . .

Mostly good . . .

Yep, despite my funk on the way home today, it was a pretty good day today. Got some nice props at work. And, perhaps the bigger news: IT RAINED.

That's right. I said IT RAINED.

Can you tell we're in a drought here in good ol' North Carolina? In fact, it's an Exceptional Drought in this area. The highest level of drought possible. Learn more here. The new map updates at 8:30 a.m. EST on Thursdays. There's rain in the forecast for the next couple of days. 90% tomorrow, 60% for Thursday and Friday. Maybe our map will change on Thursday morning, but I doubt that we'll get that much tonight and tomorrow.

It's funny to me that the sound of rain is so foreign these days that I have to check to see if it really is rain. You know, one of those things where you have to check to make sure, because you haven't heard rain in so long?

Yep, it was pouring at about 7 p.m. this evening, and I had to go OUTSIDE to make sure it really was rain. Told a couple of friends I wanted to go play in it.

Alas, it didn't last that long.

I would have, if for no other reason than to say that I played in the rain again. Yeah, it's something I've done in my life before, but it's not something I do nearly enough and given that it's not rained in a long time, it's the first thing that popped to mind.

Maybe I'll get to play in the rain tomorrow. And Thursday. And Friday.

:)

10.19.2007

Night at the Movies

Went to go see Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix tonight. Marvelous stuff. Great music, effects, sound . . . the whole thing is just packaged very well.

I love fantasy films. Always have. They're always the easiest to make the "suspension of disbelief" requirement work. And it's not just fantasy films. You could basically lump everything fiction into that category for me. Books and tv series also fit the bill. (Yes, I did grow up on Star Trek. Not only Star Trek, but also Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Voyager. Yes, that quite correctly implies I watched the series for most of my 30 years now. I'll still stop on it if I find it on cable, too.).

At the end of the movie, I was quite impressed by Harry's last lines: "We'll have something Voldemort will never have. Something worth fighting for." Of course, the implication in that is that friends and family are worth fighting for.

All I've got to say to that is, "Amen, brother."

10.13.2007

Personal Branding (or, My Journey of Further Self-Discovery)

I recently decided to undertake a personal branding project. Basically, it's a great chance to look at yourself, as objectively as possible, with the help of whomever you'd like to help. You take that gathered knowledge, apply a bunch of marketing tools to it, and sit down to make yourself the human version of Tide. Or Kleenex. Or Sony. Or any major brand. But, as any brand, what sets you apart from everyone else is the key.

In any case, it's not necessarily a journey filled with sunshine and rainbows. Pretty early in the endeavor, you have to do a SWOT analysis (Strengths/Weaknesses/Opportunities/Threats). Strengths are great for self-esteem, while weaknesses are not. However, these two are both the easier part of the process, at least in theory. As Kleenex knows that it is the strongest tissue or the softest, it also knows it's not the cheapest. When becoming a brand (or realizing the brand you already are), you should know about yourself.

Weaknesses are not necessarily something to be fixed. Part of the Kleenex brand is that not everyone will want to spend the money for the product. That's acceptable. Although I've not worked through my SWOT analysis completely yet, I'd bet that deciphering which weaknesses should be ameliorated or not is the bigger challenge. Since I'm also of the mind that these traits are weaknesses for a reason and it's perhaps a much more worthwhile use of your time to improve strengths, you also need to decide which warrant the time and energy, which will have the greatest return for you.

Luckily, you get to write the "threats" off completely. It's basically the unknown out there that challenges your brand. If you know about an external challenge to your brand, then it's an opportunity.

Ergo, of the 100% of energy that you'll spend on this project after conducting your SWOT analysis, it's nice to know that you only have to spread that energy whole over three of the four areas.

It appears that I'm not the only one I know on a significant self-discovery journey these days either. It appears that my youngest sis is also on a journey, at least that's the way it appears from her blog. (Sorry - no link here. She keeps it "invitation only.") Wish us luck.

And here's a little insight into me, rediscovered during this process: I recently found a recording on the web of my favorite children's song (forgive the particularly horrible keyboard-ish quality). What's particularly interesting is that I'd forgotten almost all of the words. I remembered the tune and the alliteration in the song, but that's it.

10.05.2007

"Dear Dog(s) of Mine . . .

(courtesy of The Best of Craigslist.com)

It seems that lately things have gotten a smidge slack around here. I feel it is time to remind you of the rules that heretofore we have operated under. You are both cute dogs, but your continued cuteness in no way negates our previous agreement. Let me remind you of a few details of this agreement.

1. In exchange for room and board, you are to guard the kingdom. That would be guarding the kingdom from any and all bad guys, robbers, serial killers, etc. Feel free to bark maniacally at any of those that should appear in the yard. Guarding the kingdom does NOT include barking maniacally at bunnies, squirrels, cows, sheep and invisible things that only you can see, especially between the hours of 5am (when I stumble out of bed to let you out) and 8am (when I actually have to be out of bed to get to work). (And let me take a moment here to remind you that the pizza guy is a potential bad guy. He is not your friend. Just because he comes bearing food does not allow him free and easy access to the kingdom. He is potentially way more dangerous than the bunnies that you threaten to tear limb from limb.)

2. All of the stuff that lives in the toy basket is yours. Everything else is mine. Yours includes squeaky balls, random bones, partially unstuffed stuffed animals and chew ropes. Mine includes any and all shoes on the floor (especially the expensive leather ones), underwear that missed the hamper, bras, socks, dishtowels, the remote, the cell phone, the legs of my grandmother's antique chair and the vacuum. Did I mention shoes? ALL the shoes are mine. They come in pairs, not quads, for a reason.

3. The cat gets to sleep on the bed. You do not. You each weigh 50 pounds. The cat weighs 12. You sleep smack dab in the middle of the bed with all four feet spread out covering approximately 12 square feet apiece. The cat sleeps in a neat little ball covering about 2 square feet. The cat does not bring fleas into the house. You do. You, dogs, will never be allowed to sleep on the bed. Quit sneaking up when you think I'm not looking. Your 50 pounds of dogginess negates your stealth superpowers. I know you are up there!!

4. Speaking of the cat- when he hunkers down into that little mound, lays his ears back, squints his eyes and growls way back in his chest, HE IS NOT A HAPPY KITTY. Leave him alone. He does not want to play with you. What he wants to do is poke your eyes out and shred the skin around your face. He can do that, you know. Five of his 6 ends are really sharp and pointy. He has previously shown very little restraint. Clearly he enjoys smacking you upside the head with a paw full of claws. Do not aggravate him. When he takes your head off after you have cornered him, I will let him. You have been forewarned.

5. The cat is mean. He will lead you down a path to destruction. He likes to tear around the house winding you up. He does this knowingly and intentionally. When you chase him, I will only yell at you for careening into walls and furniture. He knows this. Quit falling for it.

6. If you find something in the garbage can, assume that I intend for it to be there. Plastic tampon shells are not chew toys. Don't eat them.

7. Also not for doggy consumption- anything you find in the litter box. This is why you no longer get to kiss me.

8. You are allowed to sleep on the furniture. You are not allowed to eat the furniture.

9. Yes, I have to leave every day to go to work. No, you cannot go with me. That's why there are two of you, so you can entertain each other. The cat gets to stay in the house. You both have to stay outside while I'm gone. The cat does not chew things up. You do. Quit whining about it. Your porch is air-conditioned. It's just like inside the house minus the sofa. If you'd quit chewing up dog beds, it would be just like inside the house. You have made your own proverbial bed by destroying two very expensive dog cushions.

10. I have opposable thumbs. This is why I get to be in charge. I can open cans, doors, and bags of treats. I am the only one in the house that can operate the hose sprayer. I'm also the only one with a driver's license and a car. I win. Being cute is no match for opposable thumbs.

While I in no way wish to suppress your rightful dogginess, I feel that these very simple guidelines will allow us to continue to co-exist in peaceful harmony. Please know though, that should you choose to continue in willful violation of these rules, I WILL PUT THE CAT IN CHARGE. He has just been itching for a position in management.

Much thanks,
The Human"

10.03.2007

So Good, I Had to Post it Now

Lyrics to The Mom Song (sung to the tune of the William Tell Overture):
Get up now
Get up now
Get up out of bed
Wash your face
Brush your teeth
Comb your sleepyhead
Here's your clothes and your shoes
Hear the words I said
Get up now! Get up and make your bed
Are you hot? Are you cold?
Are you wearing that?
Where's your books and your lunch and your homework at?
Grab your coat and gloves and your scarf and hat
Don't forget! You gotta feed the cat
Eat your breakfast, the experts tell us it's the most important meal of all
Take your vitamins so you will grow up one day to be big and tall
Please remember the orthodontist will be seeing you at 3 today
Don't forget your piano lesson is this afternoon so you must play
Don't shovel
Chew slowly
But hurry
The bus is here
Be careful
Come back here
Did you wash behind your ears?
Play outside, don't play rough, will you just play fair?
Be polite, make a friend, don't forget to share
Work it out, wait your turn, never take a dare
Get along! Don't make me come down there
Clean your room, fold your clothes, put your stuff away
Make your bed, do it now, do we have all day?
Were you born in a barn? Would you like some hay?
Can you even hear a word I say?
Answer the phone! Get off the phone!
Don't sit so close, turn it down, no texting at the table
No more computer time tonight!
Your iPod's my iPod if you don't listen up
Where are you going and with whom and what time do you think you're coming home?
Saying thank you, please, excuse me makes you welcome everywhere you roam
You'll appreciate my wisdom someday when you're older and you're grown
Can't wait till you have a couple little children of your own
You'll thank me for the counsel I gave you so willingly
But right now I thank you not to roll your eyes at me
Close your mouth when you chew, would appreciate
Take a bite maybe two of the stuff you hate
Use your fork, do not burp or I'll set you straight
Eat the food I put upon your plate
Get an A, get the door, don't get smart with me
Get a grip, get in here, I'll count to three
Get a job, get a life, get a PHD
Get a dose of,
"I don't care who started it!
You're grounded until you're 36"
Get your story straight and tell the truth for once, for heaven's sake
And if all your friends jumped off a cliff would you jump, too?
If I've said it once, I've said at least a thousand times before
That you're too old to act this way
It must be your father's DNA
Look at me when I am talking
Stand up straighter when you walk
A place for everything and everything must be in place
Stop crying or I'll give you something real to cry about
Oh!
Brush your teeth, wash your face, put your PJs on
Get in bed, get a help, say a prayer with mom
Don't forget, I love you
And tomorrow we will do this all again because a mom's work never ends
You don't need the reason why
Because, because, because, because
I said so, I said so, I said so, I said so
I'm the mom, the mom, the mom, the mom, the mom!!

Music in the Streets

Music in the Streets logo is from the Downtown Winston-Salem Partnership website. Clicking on the logo will take you to the Music in the Streets website.

In my inbox today, I find the following message from Smitty:

"A message from the Music in the Streets Organizers:
The Downtown Winston-Salem Partnership is conducting this survey to gather the ideas and opinions of the Summer Music Series event attendees from the recently completed 2007 season. The survey responses will assist the Downtown Winston-Salem Partnership with determining the success of the 2007 season and assist with planning for future events in the summer of 2008.

A Message from Smitty's Notes (THE source for all good things to do in the city):
Smittyheads - Please do take a moment to fill out this survey. Everyone's opinion counts. Comments are encouraged and will be much appreciated. Feel free to forward this message and survey link along to friends, family and colleagues.

Many thanks for your time and consideration in this community announcement."


As a gal who loves the Music in the Streets series and one who has an affinity for surveys, if you've ever been to ANY of the Music in the Streets concerts (Alive at Five, Fourth Street Jazz & Blues, or Summer on Trade - not Rock the Block), PLEASE fill out the concert survey. It only takes 5 minutes or so (and that's if you comment a lot). I'd hate to see the city lose this wonderful series of events because they didn't get responses from everyone who had an opinion.

9.30.2007

Squeeze me . . .

I need a copy of this sign . . .

Word for the weekend

Courtesy of Dictionary.com's Word of the Day:
doff \DOF\, transitive verb:
1. To take off, as an article of clothing.
2. To tip or remove (one's hat).
3. To put aside; to rid oneself of.

9.26.2007

Dear Keri

I learned yesterday that a high school friend of mine is dying from ALS. She's 29. She's just had her first baby, and she can no longer hold the child.

Although we haven't really kept in touch through the years, I have seen Keri at the occasional neighborhood event - most notably, Chicken Stew.

She's always been beautiful, popular, and successful. When I was younger, I was jealous because of her gifts. Now that I'm older and wiser, I'm not jealous of Keri's gifts any longer, because I realize my own. Even in the throes of her disease, she's still beautiful, popular, and successful. What a wonderful testament to her spirit.

You can read about Keri and her struggle with ALS, the challenges she's having and the support she's getting from her family and friends here, courtesy of the Winston-Salem Journal. If you'd like to see the outpouring of support she's getting from the community, check out the website her friend, Jennifer Lassiter, is keeping for her here.

I might add that the best quote in the article is the one with which it ends, courtesy of Jennifer: "At 29, I never thought I'd be helping my best friend die." How telling. Keri's obviously got an irreplaceable friend in her.

9.18.2007

Echoes of Friendship

It's odd, isn't it? This year - a year that I'd hoped would be one of my best but doesn't seem to be going that way so far - I've had the opportunity to appreciate my friends more so than I ever have. When I think about what I am grateful for during this past year, my friends top the list.

Of course, this gratitude has manifested itself in a number of ways. I blog about how lucky I am to have them - often. I'm trying to fill their needs as much as they've filled mine. I look for ways to really thank them for what they've done for me.

I find ways to remind myself of these special people. I've got a bunch of pictures to remind me of them. And I often stumble upon something in art echoes the friendships I've got. This year, in particular, one refrain of one song continues to do that for me.

I've had to look the song up, as it's been included on a compilation CD that I've had since undergrad to which I no longer own the CD jacket. It's called Edge of Falling, by Ethan Pierse (aka Tim Pigman). I've found the lyrics online and a sample (both below, thanks to ethanpierse.com). My one complaint is simply that the sample sounds very different than the song I've got on my Awakening Compilation CD - and the sample sounds very overdone. IMHO, the simpler sound to the song on the compilation CD is more preferable.

In any case, it's the refrain that echoes my dear friendships these days, because I know I've had people pick me up and keep me going.

Thanks, guys. You're the best.

Lyrics of "Edge of Falling"
I've been away so very long
Doing all I said I'd never do.
But now that still small voice,
it is calling to me
Calling me back home to you

Hesitation, don't turn back now, just go on
You know it's too late
Too late to right all those wrongs
Stop to see if you'd been checking up on me
Only to find, you're still looking out to see
Me walking down that road
Can't wait to have you hold me and hear you say, to hear you say

Refrain
I am strong if you are weak
Pick you up and keep you going
Stop hanging on now and walk with me
I am strong if you are weak
Pick you up and keep you going
Stop hanging on now and walk with me at the edge of falling

All my struggles, no telling where or whence they came
But I've got to face them all just the same
Can't turn right, pride and piety beware
I can't turn left, only depravity's left there
Keep looking up, stay in line, and follow the signs and wait
I need to hear you say

Refrain

This isn't a war where I win and where you lose
It's about the chosen and the many and the few
Oh they try to walk straight, but our hearts they turn back
And we're yearning to find something that says we are home
Bring me home
I just want to be home
I am home

Refrain

Amazon.com sample of "Edge of Falling" from The Awakening Compilation:
(click the image below to listen)

"Edge of Falling" sample from EthanPierse.com

9.17.2007

Friendship

(January 22, 1999)

In every life there are sunshine people and rainy day people. There are giving people and those who take, but very few of those who understand.

To have someone understand why we cry or laugh, why we feel sad for no apparent reason, is to have a friend. A friend accepts our changes of mood without telling us to "snap out of it." They know that if we could easily handle tears we would have done it already.

All our loneliness and worry and fear seems to fade in the presence of a friend who never judges, but stands along side us with loyalty. My friend, take my hand and walk with me until you can walk alone. It gives us what we need to be a friend as well.

Peace,
Tawanka

9.16.2007

My absence from the blogosphere

If you read my blog often (or at least take interest when a new post loads into Google Reader or your favorite RSS aggregator), then you know I've been gone for a while. Or, as I've called it before, I was "going dark." Suffice it to say that there's been a lot going on, much of which required me to write elsewhere.

If you write with any frequency at all, you realize that there are many different reasons for writing. Sometimes, you feel the need to share your thoughts with no one but yourself - and thinking it through doesn't fully accomplish the goal. Your thoughts have to see paper (or a screen). (As an aside, there's a great blog out there, One Year of Writing and Healing, where this theory is proved on a regular basis.)

Sometimes, you feel the need to share those thoughts with your trusted advisors (thanks, guys; you know who you are). Sometimes, those thoughts can be shared with anyone who finds them - ergo, this blog.

In the past four weeks or so, my writing has been limited to the former two, and thus, my posts here haven't appeared with any sense of regularity or timeliness. Surely, if you are a writer, then you also understand that if you find yourself constrained to that ilk of writing - wherein only you and the minds of a select few understand your current mindset - then it's also no surprise that further writing is a horrible chore. When pondering some of the decisions I've been thinking of lately, completely focusing on a different topic is a horrendous endeavor. And, given that my posts often arrive later in the day, the fact that I'm completely out of energy should come as no surprise. Ergo, I've been absent from the blogosphere for a bit.

My marketing mind has a complete conniption at this realization. Although I've not checked my Analytics report, I'm sure that my readership has plummeted (with the exception of the web robots). I know that I need to post on a semi-regular basis (at least) and that it's got to be interesting to keep the readers I've got. I also know that you're supposed to give your readers a clue if you disappear, which I obviously did not do. For that, I apologize.

I've broken rules about blogging that I tell my clients to follow. Sheesh. "Do as I say, not as I do." Please.

While I'm on the topic of blogging, I might mention that I've accepted an invitation to attend ConvergeSouth with my dear friend, Melody. Of course, it now appears that work will get in the way, and I may be only able to attend the Friday evening and Saturday events, but that's life. Gotta keep the clients happy.

More later - and soon. Promise. Maybe tonight, even.

8.26.2007

Not a bad . . .

looking elf. Don't much care for him in anything else, but I love the elf bit. Something amazingly mysterious and completely hot about it. Yum . . .


Photos courtesy of orlandobloom.wz.cz. Can't vouch for their authenticity on that site, though. Couldn't find good ones on imdb.

8.21.2007

Live, Love, Laugh

It's an easy way to sum up the past 10 days or so. While tourney is great, so very rewarding, the complete exhaution that one feels (and the occasional stress) ends up making everyone extremely emotional. The saving grace is that the good times completely outweigh the hard ones, that you're surrounded by people who understand everything that you encounter and can share their own stories as well, and the people who agree to participate in the journey that is tournament.

The best quote of tournament, aside from the typical "That's what she said" quotes, was this: "If I wore a dress like that, I'd look like a giraffe."

This year's song (yep, we choose a song every year in the media center):




Thriller, as performed by the inmates.

Last year's was Milkshake.






And no, there's no real way to dance to "Jump" by Van Halen, but damned if I didn't try!

(Here it is if you forgot what it sounds like:


Van HalenJump)

Great bands that I saw last week: Liquid Pleasure and Sleeping Booty.

8.07.2007

Vocation vs. Avocation

(January 21, 1999)

Other people have no more power than we do. They have the knack for making us think they can do anything.

A little adjustment in our minds will stop the thought that we must cope and compete with those who have greater advantages. If we believe anything holds us back, limits our ability, we can know without a doubt that more ability resides in us than we will ever have time to hone and develop.

When we are doing something we love to do, it comes naturally to mind our own business and to polish our own skills. Love for the right work takes it out of the role of labor and competition and makes it into a work of art.

Then, the little competitive self is dissolved into a giant that didn't realize how much he was growing.

Peace,
Tawanka

Om . . .

Yep, I really should be doing some yoga. Or sleeping. Especially since I need to be somewhere by 7:30 a.m. tomorrow morning.

It's going to be a busy week. Next week is going to be even more ridiculous, but fun. And amazingly rewarding. Tournament starts.

Regardless, the point is that I need to be taking care of myself so that I don't turn into the witch that I can turn into when I'm grumpy. Which has already happened. (Sorry, again. You know who you are.)

Nonetheless, wanted to share this with all of you: the great fun I had last Thursday evening at the opening at the Marshall Art Gallery, where Melody made a necklace I just had to have. And I've got a piece of marvelous fused glass that I truly don't know what to do with, except stare. It's been providing a good amount of amusement for me at the new job. Yep, I'm decorating my office with original art . . . I'm waiting on more to get here (any day now!) from Etsy.

I'd also be remiss to not mention that I've just remembered that Melody also shares my lust for a certain Matthew McConaughey. Here's her bit about him, and yet, about someone else as well. I'm ready for a reason to watch him on the big screen again . . .

And to let you know to be on the lookout for posts about:
- Black holes
- The draining of the pond by my parents' house
- Sunlight and breast cancer
- My take on the Slate.com response to the "death cat"
- A random bitch about why Jimmy Buffet hasn't announced for NC yet this year
- Etc.

8.03.2007

Why I Can't Accept Any More . . .

book recommendations or loaned books or go to Borders or Barnes and Noble or surf Amazon:

7.30.2007

One more reason . . .

why I like my job. I get emails that say this:

"Just in case your windows are down - it looks like we are getting ready to have a storm."

How nice.

7.28.2007

An Odd Cat

and yet, I find Oscar somehow comforting. Having had cats almost all my life, it completely makes sense to me that he'd have this special gift.


Photo (c) Dina Rudick, Boston Globe; Video (c) NBC Nightly News

Other links about Oscar: The Boston Globe story; Their photos; New England Journal of Medicine; AP/MSNBC.

7.26.2007

The Rules for Blogging

Today was the day of many topics to blog about. I can definitely say that I'm set for the week. Stay tuned for more on that later . . .

Nonetheless, the topic I'm going to pick for this evening is this: blogging rules. It's happened again that a good friend didn't define their rules completely before getting into the blogosphere (something I have to admit that I did as well) and thus, their presence in the blogosphere changed drastically and without warning.

Now, as many in the blogosphere know, such changes are completely unexpected and cause concern in your readers especially if you have a fairly large and/or loyal readership. I've got a blog I'm stalking right now that hasn't had a post in months, but they used to post several times a day! (No, you don't get that link. It's NWS and it speaks to #7 on The List.) It's upsetting, to say the least.

Ergo, here's the draft of The Rules for Blogging. In no way shape or form is this a complete or un-alterable list. Jump in and let me know what you'd change or what you'd add. (Yep, I learned some of these the hard way. Just ask my friend Jess or my friend Jim.)

1) If you've got a significant other, tell them you have/are starting a blog and how to get to it. If they never look at it, you've done your part. Might be good to share your rules for what goes on the blog with them, so they don't have to be concerned about what may or may not appear on the blog. Remember that your significant other (and everyone else in the world with an Internet connection) can see it whenever they want, if they can find it. Don't forget that.

2) In consideration of the significant other, DON'T post anything offensive or that could be perceived as too personal UNLESS you've got permission from them BEFORE you post. Now, if you don't so much care for that significant other and aren't concerned about helping to define the legality of social media and first amendment rights or aren't concerned about a libel or slander lawsuit, post away. Post it once, and it's always there (especially after the web spiders get to it).

3) Don't write stuff you wouldn't admit in public. For me, after I mentioned my duck (the post), I realized I wasn't ready to post about it. However, my perspective on sexuality has shifted and I don't mind at all now. Realize however that some things are still not public: i.e., #7 on The List.

4) Decide what's off-limits. For me, work is always off-limits; I don't need to be dooced. I need my job. (If you're interested, Heather Armstrong's experience provided the nomenclature for this phenomenon.)

Intimate conversations with friends are also off-limits, as well as any significant reference to their lives. My family is sometimes off, sometimes on; depends on the situation.

5) Decide on pictures and video content. What will you post? What won't you post? Why? If you don't know why, you won't stick with your decision. Beware of copyright laws - and know a lawyer.

6) Be fair and give credit where it's due. Don't steal someone else's blog post. Sure, if they've got a topic that gets your writing bristles up, go for it. But give them credit for having the idea first. Link. And consider a Creative Commons license. (They're free.)

7) Ask the blogger before you add a blog to your blog roll. Admittedly, I haven't done
this, but I should have. The people who read your blog may be some other blogger's worst nightmare. The only way they may have found that blogger was through your blog roll.

8) Admit when you're wrong and publicly correct the error. We're all human and we all know that eventually, you're gonna screw up. Deal. (Here's an example, courtesy of Cara Michele at Chosen Fast.)

9) Learn about your blog/hosting service. Know how it works. Know what the passwords do. Know what's public and what's not before you jump right in. And don't be afraid to use the knowledge base. Those people know everything about hosting/blog service. They developed it - and continue to improve it. Let them help.

10) When lurking/commenting on someone else's blog, follow their lead. If they don't cuss, you'd better not. If you know them IRL and they don't specifically mention or name parts of their life on the blog, don't dare. It might violate one of their blogging rules.

And, since 10 is a nice, round number and it's past my bedtime, that's where I'll stop. I expect to hear your thoughts or opinions on this. Chime in.

7.24.2007

I want this parrot




*Thanks to the people at Corona (and, inevitably, their ad agency) for such wonderful work.

Where does the time go?

Why is it that I hit upon the realization today that in about a week, it's AUGUST?

It's not so much that tournament is in August. I'm well aware of that and I know it's been charging at me with full force ever since I agreed to do it before last year's tournament had even begun. It's not that.

It's that I'm trying to figure out where my summer went. Why haven't I found my way to Carowinds yet? Or Emerald Pointe? Wasn't this the summer that I was actually going to go to the Bowman Gray track? Why hasn't Jimmy Buffet announced a concert here yet? Why is Dave Matthews coming so late - in September? Why haven't I been to the beach more often? Or to the mountains at all?

I'm sure this has something to do with the fact that I realized the days are getting shorter. When the alarm went off this morning, the second thought I had (after the obligatory curses of the clock) was this: "The sun's not streaming through my window this morning."

I'm also sure that it has something to do with the fact that it was a bit overcast today, and I have to admit that I'm probably susceptible to SAD, like my aunt is. I hate gloomy, overcast, dreary, yucky weather. Makes me feel like crap.

There's always a disconnect for me between the solstices and when they actually "happen" for me: I don't feel the days getting shorter or longer right after the solstice. Heck, this year, I didn't feel the change until damn near August, and the summer solstice is June 21.

Realizing that the summer solstice has actually passed upsets me. I'm a summer girl at heart. Always have been. Love the heat. Love the humidity.

Love what you can do in summer that just doesn't happen in the fall, winter or spring: like eat a really good, fresh, ripe tomato that you just pulled off of the plant 30 seconds ago. Or entertain that fantasy of skinny dipping - and maybe, just maybe, if the timing was right, do it. Or drink Coronas whenever you want because it just feels right. Or go to see the Grasshoppers or the Warthogs. Or go to Music in the Streets. Or stay up late, because your body thinks that 9:30 p.m. or 10 p.m. is too early. "Wasn't it just light a little bit ago?" it asks.

*Sigh.*

There is an appointed time for everything, and a time for every affair under the heavens.
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to uproot the plant.
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to tear down, and a time to build.
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones, and a time to gather them;
a time to embrace, and a time to be far from embraces.
A time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away.
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to be silent, and a time to speak.
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace . . .
I recognized that there is nothing better than to be glad and to do well during life.
-Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, 12, NAB

7.22.2007

Focus, Peace, and Success

(January 20, 1999)

Pushmataha, Chief of the Choctaws, understood our weaknesses as well as our strengths. He knew how willing we are to give in to abuse for fear of having no peace at all.

Peace at any price is very familiar to the American Indian. And we know how a little success can do away with common sense - how it can remove the stops that keep us on the true path.

A stable attitude can offset the extremes where we sometimes find ourselves. GOOD peace is an inside job, a place where we cultivate the development of our own spirits before we look to our surroundings for strength and sustenance.

The heart and soul that loves peace wants others to be peaceful and will never miss the mark of excellence.

Never be elevated above measure by success . . . nor delighted with the sweets of peace to suffer insults.

Peace,
Tawanka