6.29.2007

Email from Grandma

(January 18, 1999; Jim is my uncle, Kathi is my aunt, Debbie is one of my sisters, and George was my grandfather. He died earlier than my grandmother, and while I know she was heartbroken - from emails like this - she knew she still had work to do on this earth and loved every day of it. I'm sure I was some of that work.)

Sorry, haven't kept up with all the latest. The computer was on the "blink" for almost a week. The c.d. modem didn't want to work . . . and just HAD to have my daily dose of Scrabble . . . so Jim replaced it for me.

It's been dangerous trying to walk up my driveway, because the snow started to melt, then froze solid. Not hard at all coming DOWN to the house . . . but sheer "you know what" trying to get up to get the paper and mail. So, I cut that chore down to once a day. I've spread de-icer on about half the drive, but can only do so much at a time.

Kathy came up on Monday, and after various attempts to get her car back up the drive - almost skidding backwards into the shop, I had her stop and we called for help. One of her friends with a 4by4 came up and pulled her right out.

We're due for a lot more snow and ice on Sunday . . . so, if I make it to Mass it will be a miracle. Every time the snowplow comes up, he blocks my drive with a foot or three of snow. Then that pile freezes hard and it's just like climbing Mt. Everest. I have a great snow plow, but I can`t move it. It's way to heavy for me. Jim usually clears it for me, but while I'm having snow up here, the "flat-landers" are getting rain. So, he always seems surprised when he comes up on Sundays and sees all the snow.

How's the job hunting going? Any likely looking prospects? By the way, what is your major in college? Have been wondering what you were planning on after the big day. Kathy and I will be there for the big day (for yours and Debbie's).

This will probably be the last trip for me . . . getting harder and harder to make that trip. God willing, I'll be able to be there this year, with lots of help from Kathy and the stewards. But each day, I thank God for another day. I look out at the deer, and the snow, and the beautiful mountains, and I say thanks to George for giving me such a beautiful place for my last years.

It's too bad that God needed a "fixer-upper" in heaven and took him early. But I know he's watching over me from up there . . . I have NO doubt.

Love you,
Grandma

6.26.2007

Laugh Out Loud

Yep. This article is that funny.

Two points, one courtesy of Jess:
(1) No more evidence is ever needed that people don't read signs.
(2) Why did they feel the need to mention the detail about only one eye? Must have been just to show exactly how much of an advantage this guy had.

Humph. Men and golf. Glad women don't do such silly things - especially since I'm about to be one of them.

6.24.2007

Perspective and Difficulty

(January 17, 1999)

We have to actively resist the suggestion that something is going to make us sick. It is not easy to talk illness and poverty without believing strongly that we may have to deal with them. The easiest way is to cancel negative suggestions and claim what we want.

Money will run for cover if we continually talk hardship - and we know what happens when someone tells us we don't look well. We begin to take our pulse and wonder whether we should lie down.

Too much sympathy and self-pity destroys our immunity to difficulty. When we shut down on it and begin to talk health and begin to talk about excellent opportunities, then we open the way to be well and prosperous.

Peace.

Tawanka

Ahh, the weekend

I may be closing in on my harbour these days, especially after the day I had yesterday. Yes, it was ridiculously busy, but the party at the end of the day was completely worth it. I always worry that people I invite from that county to the east will decide the drive won't be worth it, so I'm still amazed and thrilled that I can get people to travel that far for a little food and a beer or two.

Still, there's mulch to be spread and weeds to be killed. But it's probably not going to happen today.

Today is sit around and do whatever I want to do day. Like ponder my sister's request that we publish Tawanka's emails. I know I've mentioned this before to certain individuals - and have been heartily encouraged to do so. The idea of actually writing the book is the one that's scary. Nonetheless, the idea continues to present itself, so I suppose it might actually be time to explore it.

I could see how this could turn into something bigger, even. While my grandmother was quite prolific with her emails at the end of her life, she always had great stories to tell. I know there are stories about wolves, about moose, about bears, her long-time postman, her foster children, her natural children, etc. The thought of collection those though, at this point, seems insurmountable. There would definitely be a trip or two to the west coast involved. Right now, I don't have the time (or the money) for that. Maybe in a couple of years . . .

6.23.2007

Idiots, I Say

It appears that the Guilford County Commissioners want to prove just how much they don't care about things that are supposedly important to Guilford County: economic development, support of the creative class, support of non-profits who serve specific missions for the residents of Guilford County, etc., etc.

Idiots.

How is Guilford County ever supposed to become what it dreams to be if its' leaders don't do what's necessary for those dreams?! They're lacking focus.

Read more here and here.

And yes, even though I DON'T pay property taxes in that county and I DON'T vote in that county, I spend more than 25% of my time there and spend lots of my money in other taxes there, so I feel like I'm justified in my opinion.

Heck, my opinion doesn't need justification. It's an opinion. Take it or leave it.

6.22.2007

YouTube and Culture

Today, I discovered Schoolhouse Rock videos on You Tube, thanks to Jim.

Schoolhouse Rock is a show which I evidently missed during my childhood, but was fairly significant to most others during their childhood. I've been reminded many times of that fact during random conversations - at work, in grad school, at bars, with other friends, etc. Of course, most of those with whom I've had these conversations seem to be close to my age, if not my age. Ergo, I wonder how I missed such a huge cultural phenomenon (as it seems to have been).

Regardless, I've always understood that it's topics were quite useful and in fact may have made many of my peers better writers, better mathematicians, and better students than they already were. (Thank God for that. There weren't a bunch of people in school who could string a decent sentence together, much less remember their multiplication tables.)

Today, I find that the information is really quite useful as I am finally exposed to the cultural phenomenon on which I've completely missed out. I certainly don't agree it's silly to think that if I watched enough of the Schoolhouse Rock videos, I could claim that shared identity which I do not have now.

Videos I've seen so far:
- Three is a Magic Number


- Conjunction Junction


- Rufus Xavier Sasparilla


- I'm Just a Bill (I could have used this myself! History is not, and probably never will be, a strength for me.)


Given that You Tube has just proven to me that it has more value than simply pure entertainment, I wonder how many other functions it serves. I'm know there's a social networking aspect (given the option to log in, post comments, post replies, etc.), but are there other instances where You Tube serves perhaps even higher purposes?

If You Tube can and does communicate culture and can create shared identity again, even years after the initial phase of communicating that culture and creating that shared identity, what else does You Tube have the power to do? Whom else can You Tube affect? Is it possible to use You Tube as a place to encourage social justice? Regime change - for third world countries? Education? Will You Tube create a professional version, where one could find information and video clips from the world over, that could be used in confidence and recognized as truly trustworthy, especially as a reference in a thesis?

Is this perhaps a situation where I simply don't know enough to realize that I don't know?

6.20.2007

Yum.

If only . . .

Timing

(January 17, 1999)

A certain amount of protection from the wind makes it pleasant to walk in the woods, even in January. It is quieter and without the activity of other seasons, but the deer come daily to feed on acorns that litter the moss-covered earth.


Timing is important, even tho' the Indian has been said to have a time of his own - arriving and leaving as he sees fit. But even nature gets ahead of herself or lags behind at times. Here in the dead of winter, a shaft of sunlight brings out tiny moth-like insects that dance up and down, going nowhere.


Doing the right thing at the right time is all important.

We tend to get over anxious and want to push ahead when it is not the right thing or time to do. We are not programmed by nature but by spirit, and from that comes the wisdom to stay or act.


Peace, Tawanka

6.17.2007

Lazy Days of Summer

Today, it was close to 90 degrees here. A wonderful, but not typical (simply because it didn't storm this evening) summer day. It was one of those days that makes you want to be outside, and yet not, because of the heat and humidity.

Given that, and given that we've actually gotten close to making up for our drought in the last couple of days (even though we're still in Moderate Drought conditions, or Abnormally Dry conditions, if you're slightly to the east of here), everyone had a bit of overdue yard work to do.

Well, at least I did.

The fence now looks like a fence, not like a tree line. The grass hasn't been mowed, but will be tomorrow (perhaps) and the back gardens were weeded as the sun went down.

There's still a bit of work to do: the front garden needs it's border finished and the excess grass killed; the back hill needs to be sprayed again so the nasty weeds die (yes, I know this is bad for the environment, but how bad can it be if they come back every month or so?), and I need to buy a small bag of grass seed to fill in the now empty spots on my lawn.

Regardless, I got a lot of work done and still had a wonderful, relaxing day. Two of my chairs are put together for the new dining set. The dishes got cleaned. Groceries were bought, as were tomato stakes. Steak was marinated and grilled. Golf was watched. Ice cream was eaten.

And yet, days like today make me long for the pool - and the beach. After having spent 5 years lifeguarding, I realize that days like today are precious. Busy for a lifeguard, but one doesn't have the boredom that's usual with overcast, rainy days. These days make me want to be outside, soaking up the sun (much to my dermatologist's chagrin).

I am a summer girl at heart. As I sit here writing this, I can hear the crickets and tree frogs chirping. I hear the stillness of the summer night. The only thing that would make it better would be the sound of waves lapping against the shore.

Margaritaville might be a good place . . .

6.13.2007

Fog and Change

(January 17, 1999)

Most changes are too subtle to be noticed. The fog that blankets the early morning, hangs so thick in the woods that the hills beyond cannot be seen. Then, without us seeing it, it is there no longer.

So it is in our relationships with other people. We do not understand the moods and changes that work their silent influence on us when we least expect it. We react to the moods of others like we do to the fog, not realizing what has happened until the silent influence has gone.

When our feelings are so in command, it is difficult to change the circumstances around us. All the experiences of a lifetime have influenced our decisions and made us react in a way that destroyed something that may never be rebuilt. When the fog lifts, it takes away the veil so that we can see a long way. But the inner-fog hides life and love and friendship - until we change it.

I am satisfied . . . I am not afraid to avow the deed that I have done . . . I am willing to bury the tomahawk and smoke the pipe of peace . . .

Peace, Tawanka

6.10.2007

"Notes on a Scandal" Review

Tonight was movie night with the parents. Watched Notes on a Scandal, starring Judi Dench and Cate Blanchett.

The first and overwhelming response: Wow, I didn't know Judi could be that much of a *&^%$. And then, realizing that I've seen many of her movies, I know that she's not, but the fact that she could pull off such an act so convincingly just makes me even more in awe of her.

I'd read a bunch of reviews when it first hit the big screen. Aside from Judi Dench, I'm not really sure why it intrigued me. I knew that it would be dark (or darker than some movies). I knew that Judi wasn't going to be decent and nice, as she is when she plays M in Casino Royale and the other Bond movies. I knew that the basic plot line was that she knew of a co-worker in her school (Sheba, played by Cate Blanchett) who's having a tryst with a student.

I did not know that the underlying plot line was that Barbara (Judi) was looking for a lover, preferably a female one, or that she would go to such lengths to force a lover into a relationship with her.

Nonetheless, I'm amazed at the interaction between the two women on the screen. I'd recommend it, but it's certainly not a "happy, happy, joy, joy, feel-good" movie.

6.09.2007

I'm ready for my library . . .

Ok, well not really. I do have two other rooms to fill with furniture first, but I simply couldn't pass up the purchase I made today for the library.

I got a typewriter. :)

Yep, a typewriter. Completely mechanical. It's little, but heavy. It's light blue with white keys that you've got to hit really hard, even when it's on the lightest pressure setting. ('Course, I'm used to having to type lightly for the computer, so I think that's the difference. The keys aren't sticking; it just takes a lot more power to get them to move than I expected!)

I am all sorts of thrilled. Other library plans: different rug, papasan chair, coffee table, simple desk, bookcases. Curtains, made with a specific fabric that I saw years ago at 1502 Fabrics.

So, anyone know where I can get extra 4mm typewriter ribbon??

6.06.2007

Rules (part II)

Today, I received the following email from a dear friend. It helps to know that the daughter is in grade school.

Everything I really need to know, I learned in my daughter's classroom. Here are the class rules:
1. Listen.
2. Do your work.
3. Be kind.
4. Clean up.

A short while later, another friend added this to the list: 5. Smile.

The question that immediately popped into my head, after these emails, was this: Were these profound thoughts a product of the teacher's brain or were they collected from the learned knowledge of the children? (I am always amazed at the perspective with which children see, especially when that perspective is used to educate an adult.)

Regardless of the genesis, the simplicity of these truths is perhaps what resonates most.

Makes me want to print it and post it - everywhere.

Rules (part I)

(January 16, 1999)

Rules are made to keep us safe and honest and well-organized - but many of them become more important than the purpose for which they were written.

We have a tendency to make rules only to fall under the power of them. If rules and laws are made and have goverened us for any length of time, it is generally thought that there can be no exceptions -- even to the point of being ridiculous.

When a rule becomes so binding that it will not allow common sense and honest action to help the people do the right thing, it is time to make a change. Rules are made to help us do our best. Rules are made to serve human beings -- not human beings made to serve the rules.

We need the rules, but the wisdom as well.

Peace, Tawanka

6.04.2007

Strength

(January 15, 1999)

Feeling drained and weak in the knees is not so much a physical problem as an emotional one. Too much pressure drains away strength and we feel we are going to pieces.

Inertia and lightheadedness may be the result of having to face something that seems beyond our power to overcome. But these will dissolve when met with strong words of strength and faith.

As soon as strength takes hold and begins to flow again, we know we have struck down something so wily and subtle that it was both real and imaginary. But nothing has power against strong words: "I will seek that which was lost, and bring again that which was driven away, and will bind up that which was broken, and will strengthen that which was sick."

And then we can ride the waves of our emotions like a canoe and not upset among the waves.

Peace, Tawanka

I am . . .

officially up past my set bed time.

And, I've updated the blog roll (the list on the left).

Funny of the day:



Quote of the day, from Anj at Best and Worst.:

"Life is about discomfort, and one of our tasks is to learn
to live graciously in the midst of that discomfort.”

Haven't encountered something that's resonated with me more than that statement there (with the exception of Grandma's statement about our responsibility for our happiness) for a while.

Certainly, I myself am learning how to be gracious within my own discomfort. Perhaps, I'd like to think, I'm even rising above graciousness. Perhaps not.

I continue to be amazed by such profundity.

6.03.2007

Treasures and blindness

(Thursday, January 14, 1999)

What we take for granted, someone else thinks is beautiful. What we want to get rid of is someone else's treasure. Sometimes we stand so close to something dear that we cannot see that it is dear.

Our lack of awareness robs us of what we assume is ours forever. We have many eyes, but most are closed or glazed over.

The eyes of the mind and spirit perceive far more than our physical eyes will ever see. The eyes of our hearing detect sound, but also feelings and attitude - and the music of the spheres. When we touch something, we not only feel but we also see the gentleness or the harshness, the depths and the heights.

No, we are never blind except when we close ourselves off and deny the very Spirit of Life.

Give heed, my child, lift up your eyes, behold the One who has brought you life.

Peace, Tawanka

Lurking . . .

Yep, a couple of people I know do lurk on my blog. Never post, but I know it's read because I hear about it in my RL or in my email or I see their visits in Google Analytics. (Figures that in the past month, I've had 158 visits to the site. Turns out most of those are robots though; I've had 27 unique visitors.)

BTW, in case you didn't know, according to Urban Dictonary:
lurk, v. On a messageboard or anything similar, to browse the board very often, but without ever posting anything.

So, here's your invitation. If you're lurking too, it's time to come out of hiding. Get a login and post. It won't kill you.

I don't run that kind of blog. Were I associated with the mob, then I might, but I'm not.

6.01.2007

Frogger Funny


From Wikipedia, just in case you missed this social phenomenon when you were younger: Frogger is an arcade game introduced in 1981. It was licensed for worldwide distribution by Sega/Gremlin, and developed by Konami. The game is regarded as a classic and was noted for its novel gameplay and theme. Frogger is still popular and versions can be found on many internet game sites.

If you feel a need to get your own copy, try this link: Get it from CNET Download.com!